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HeidiMaetrix

alternative Fashion & lifestyle

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heidimaetrix

I finally decided to talk about the years of traum I finally decided to talk about the years of trauma I experienced from the age of 3 due to growing up in a cult on an episode of the podcast “Everybody Hates Healthcare”

The link is in my story highlights

Fair warning though I talk about the physical, psychological, and emotional abuse I endured as well as thoughts of unaliving. So please listen at your own discretion. 

#traumahealing #traumasurvivor #cptsdrecovery #cptsd #cptsdawareness #cultsurvivor #cultshit #heidimaetrix #417sgf #417sgfmo
You can’t see my face but I’m crying because I You can’t see my face but I’m crying because I’m so sad to be missing all the snow in Springfield missouri right now!😂

#stlucia🇱🇨 #stluciaisparadise #saintlucia🇱🇨 #saintlucia #kawaiiswimwear #2023fashion #outfitinspo #summer2023
The plot of the sleeper hit horror movie Skinamari The plot of the sleeper hit horror movie
Skinamarink in 12 seconds! 

#skinamarink #horrorgirlsclub #spookyvibes #horrorgirls #skinamarinkmovie #horrorgirlsdoitbetter #scaryreels
On the weekends you can find me in the aisles of m On the weekends you can find me in the aisles of my favorite Asian grocery stores here in Springfield.

#asiangrocery #asiansnacks #asiansnack #conveniencestores #gasstationpics #sgfmolocal #417sgf #genzfashion
Obsessed with my loungewear haul from @gaiagaia_of Obsessed with my loungewear haul from @gaiagaia_official ! A new brand from @zoekarssen 

#tryonhaul #haulreel #tryonreel #unboxingreel #loungewearset #widelegpants #gaiagaia #zoekarssen
I had the hardest time doing this new transition! I had the hardest time doing this new transition! It was so hard to match the speed and placement of the two shots, and I don’t really think I nailed it but… this was the best take I had before I rage quit! 😂 

#newtransition #transitionideas #transitionreel #transitionreels💫 #trendingtransition #sgfmo #417girls #417style
The difference between PTSD and CPTSD comes down t The difference between PTSD and CPTSD comes down to the causes and symptoms.

They aren’t so much separate conditions, as they are  a severity of the same condition. If you imagine PTSD on a scale as coming in at 100, CPTSD comes in on that scale at 150-200.
#cptsd #cptsdawareness #cptsdsurvivor #cptsdrecovery #mentalillnessadvocate #417sgf #sgfmo
Literally EVERYONE knew I was Bisexual before I di Literally EVERYONE knew I was Bisexual before I did! Like how was I the last to get the memo? 

#springfieldmo #417sgf #sgfmo #417style #gaypride2023 #bisexualmemes #bisexualgirl #bisexualpride🌈
get ready with me and @ajtheillustrator to watch @ get ready with me and @ajtheillustrator to watch @meetm3gan in theaters! 

the movie took a little while to get going but once it did, I really enjoyed watching M3gan get sweet, sweet revenge! 

#m3gan #m3ganmovie #m3ganfilme #getreadywithme #getreadywithmevideo #meganmovie
Should I get bangs? I swear every year I ask mys Should I get bangs? 

I swear every year I ask myself the same thing. But every time I have bangs I always end up trimming them myself when I’m anxious and they wind up halfway up my forehead. 

#silverhaircolor #whitehair #90sbangs #pastelgrungeaesthetic #softgrungeaesthetics #asianfashion #winteroutfits❄️
The older I get the more I realize who gives a fly The older I get the more I realize who gives a flying fuck what society thinks I should wear! Dressing your age is a sexist saying that implies that as a woman gets older she can no longer be seen as fun, attractive, or sexy. She suddenly has to become this sexless “mature” and “respectable” version of herself that blends into the background and shuns the spotlight. And frankly I am not here for that. 

#fashionforwomenover30 #fashionadvice #2023fashion #2023style #fashionreels #fashionreelstylereel #fashionreelscreator #heidimaetrix
Got my first order from @wconcept and I’m legit Got my first order from @wconcept and I’m legit obsessed with these low rise baggy pants from @thecentaur_official that I got! 
Not sponsored. Just love that I found a site that features independent designers from South Korea with free shipping! 

#southkoreanfashion #southkoreafashion #koreanfashionootd #koreanstylefashion #thecentaur #wconceptkorea #wconcept #springoutfitideas #wmuse
CPTSD Ep 1. If you’ve ever wondered “what is CPTSD Ep 1. 
If you’ve ever wondered “what is CPTSD?” Or have never heard the term before this video will introduce you to the symptoms and causes of this lesser known psychiatric condition.

Two more symptoms I forgot to mention are Dissociative episodes, and memory problems. Which checks out because I have terrible memory due to CPTSD.

#cptsd #cptsdawareness #cptsdsymptoms #cptsdrecovery #traumainformed #childhoodtrauma #cptsdhelp #cptsdsupport
Here’s to all my fellow introverts staying in wh Here’s to all my fellow introverts staying in while the rest of the world parties🥂 

#nye2023 #nyeoutfit #grungeaesthetics #grungeoutfit #grungeoutfitideas #417style #sgfmo #heidimaetrix
Get dressed with me in some of my favorite alterna Get dressed with me in some of my favorite alternative Asian slow fashion brands.
This outfit is giving Wednesday Adams/ dark academia.

Top @mukzin_official 
Jack let @mukzin_official 
Skirt and tie @morph8ne_official 
Boots @nakedwolfe 

#wednesdayaddamsoutfit #darkacademiaoutfit #gothoutfitoftheday #asianfashion #altfashionoutfit #altfashiongirl #cutewinteroutfits #417style #heidimaetrix
My style has definitely changed a leeetle bit sinc My style has definitely changed a leeetle bit since 2020 

#2020vs2022 #2020youvs2022you #nye2023
Creating my 2022 recap made me realize that I real Creating my 2022 recap made me realize that I really don’t get out much! But when I do, I try to make it a good one! Knocked Italy off my list this year, and can’t wait to visit more places in 2023

#2022recap #2022recaptemplate #2022recapreel
I’m pretty sure that’s the self talk my therap I’m pretty sure that’s the self talk my therapist was talking about. 

#selftalking #mentalhealthmeme #mentalhealthmemes🖤 #funnyreelsdaily #altgirlsofig #missourigirl #417sgf 
#heidimaetrix
How to style that sweater you have no idea to do w How to style that sweater you have no idea to do with.

#outfitreel #reelfashion #stylereels #fashionreels #ootdreel #fashionstyle #currentlywearing #fashionaesthetic #mystyle #outfitinspiration #cold #417style #cutewinteroutfits #christmas2022gifts
If one more person tells me “you shouldn’t be If one more person tells me “you shouldn’t be on anti-depressants it’s not healthy for you” I’m gunna lose it! 😡 there’s nothing weak about needing medication to treat an illness. Nobody says that to diabetics. But mental illness still has a stigma around it that it’s “not a real illness” and that’s where those toxic comments from.

#mentalillnessmemes #mentalillnessmeme #mentallyillmeme #mentalillnessstigma #417sgf #417sgfmo #heidimaetrix #mentalhealthmeme
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